Meanspeed® Music Review

This song by the American band Nirvana called Smells Like Teen Spirit is the ultimate, the “archetype” song in contemporary music. The song is within one beat per minute as the haunted EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE by the Police (Again, thank you jack for the 4th row center seats for same concert at same stadium, August 5th, 2007), BILLIE JEAN (by Michael “whoooooooooooo!” Jackstone) and Clapton’s pleading, burning, yearning LAYLA. This list is taken from this page. All songs are were chosen at random. Are the emotive themes SO obvious that no one but the staff at Meanspeed Music will say: the speed of a song is more predictive of emotive content than any other element of a song? Hey, you readers, I have the statistics of your visits. Meanspeed Music Theory is the best kept secret in music. Is speed the most important element of a song? No. Is the music determinism, the idea that speed predicts the emotion, the most OVERLOOKED theory in music? We think so! Actually we *know* so – but until that of a Collins, McCartney or Simon Cowell publicly acknowledges that the theory is tested and worthy, we at Meanspeed Music Studio forge ahead. Tom Brady’s Track #21 from his iTunes Athletic Inspirations Playlist is “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana. Says Tom: “One of the first songs on my workout playlist.” The “meaning” of this song is not known. What is known is that on their NEVERMIND album, what became “Smells Like Teen Spirit” was never written as a song. Rather, it was a guitar riff of Cobain that became infectious among the engineers. The engineers and the rest of the band encouraged Kurt to finish what is now the most famous song the left handed mystery man left behind. What could be behind the angst? Could it have been Kurt’s mental torture, as he was drinking bottles of codeine (a prescription narcotic) and Jack Daniels whiskey (poison, by definition) around the clock during the recording of the album? Was it a case of Alvin Toffler-esque FUTURE SHOCK? Meaning: This American empire was in 1991 (and keep in mind, 9/11 was over a decade away) so vast as to be almost uncontrollable, and society changing from Agrarian–>Industrial–>Technological–>Digital as to create an undefinable frustrated malaise amongst the population. Could Kurt have been more spot on? ‘Spot on’ is an English phrase that thanks to the rise of genius Ricky Gervais makes it acceptable to use in the States. We really began to see this portrayed perfectly in the classic film – the *ultimate* high school movie which prophesied mass high school massacres: Heathers starring Christian Slater and Winona [Horowitz] Ryder. Frustration about the future of the Western world is keenly seen by the Valley people. The final scene of the masterpiece–Heathers–bear the most eerie liking to the music video for Smells Like Teen Spirit.

And the Smells like Teen video? The video features a distorted high school scene of mass murder. Kurt was indeed a prophet: he could see that with civilization has cancer – uncontrollable growth that will kill the host – as nuclear weapons WILL kill every human – the only question is *when*. Any Dennis Kusinich out there who is going to “do away with WMD” – call me up, *I* could use some pie-in-the-sky foolishness. But for you optimists out there:

Meanspeed® Tempo Graphic - Nirvana - Smells Like Teen Spirit

All graphs are based on a spreadsheet generated with this method, as described on this page’s Methodology drop-down screen: a) I calibrated groups of every single measure (four quarter-notes) ten times with Seiko 300-lap stopwatches; b) Ten trials were averaged, coordinated and synthesized. I the created the speed graph in Microsoft’s Excel for MacIntosh 2004 on an Apple iBook G4 as hardware. One of the graphs derived from the results, in a radar graph style was printed on an Epson CX4600, scanned on same printing device. The fine espresso coffee made at Meanspeed Music Studio was courtesy of Meredith and United States Army Bronze Star Army Captain Jeff Schneider of TexasRoast.com.

speed graph © 2007 meanspeed.com

This song by the American band Nirvana called Smells Like Teen Spirit is the ultimate grunge rock foreboding song. What is foreboding, anyway? Courtesy of Mirriam Webster’s Collegiate 11th edition: coined around 14 c.–an omen, prediction or presentiment esp. of coming evil: portend. Most useful: the descriptive word “foreboding”‘ is the presentimet or fortelling which indicates that the speaker/singer/musician feels an indescribable force–often, as noted, a bad omen. Then again, as anyone knows who has been in a situation where all hopes seemed dashed by a terrible sign of things to come, all matters about which you stress are resolved with a positive ending . In Kurt Cobain’s case, the result was: suicide. was this song a presetiment of Kurt’s blowing himself away? Only Hole knows for sure. With so much written about the apparent “meanig” of this song, as linked above on sites as established as Wikipedia.org and Songfacts.com that I have chosen a graph made with numerical coordinates that visually display the warning about dangerous things to come associated with this song: Kurt’s suicide, an American empire so vast as to be almost uncontrollable, and society changing from Agrarian–>Industrial–>Technological–>Digital so fast and furious as to create an undefinable frustrated malaise amongst the young. We really started to see this portrayed perfectly in the classic film Heathers starring Christian Slater and Winona [Horowitz] Ryder: the frustration about the future of the Western world is keenly seen by the Valley people. The final scene of the masterpiece–Heathers–bear the most eerie liking to the music video for Smells Like Teen Spirit.

Ian Schneider
February 10, 2008